Racism?

The toenail on the big toe of my right foot is turning black.

Is it racist that this makes me unhappy.

Deadly Sloth Returns!!!

.....Evidently this here "blogging" experiment kinda got shifted to a back burner over the summer; as soon as school ended I no longer needed a creative release or feel-good procrastination activity. Now I'm back at the educational grind and I think it's about time I got back into the blog as well.

Bleu Cheez Whiz

So I'm eating this Cheez Whiz that has been in the fridge for probably seven months now. The label fell off a while ago, but I'm sure it's well past the listed expiry date. This begs the question, does Cheez Whiz ever go bad? Or does it actually get better with age like real cheese? If it gets moldy do you call it Bleu Cheez Whiz? Or is that a no-go cause it's not actually cheese... Maybe Kraft should introduce a new line of gourmet aged Cheez Whizzes, including Bleu Cheez Whiz, cause obviously people who like Cheez Whiz are the kind of people who appreciate fine cheeses...

Hmmm... My instinct tells me the "best before" date is a scam to get non-fatass people to buy more if they haven't finished the jar in a few months. I've never thought about it before but maybe there's a difference between a "best before date" and an "expiry date," some sort of legal loophole. I used to drink a lot of "expired" pop in high school, courtesy of a friend who stocked a Coke warehouse and was charged with getting rid of the old bottles; that never made me sick or anything. In any case, I don't think Cheez Whiz could really get any worse than when you first buy it, so bon apétit.

Theatrical Sloth says:

Post 1: Frasier, relic of an ancient time

Frasier is the most interesting show on television. Well, maybe not, but it just came on and I'm too lazy to find the remote to change it, so Frasier is the only show on television right now. Frasier, to me, is a relic of an ancient time. It was a time when Seattle was the greatest city in America. It's really hard to articulate, but theres just something about the sophisticated intellectualism, the refined tastes, and the distinct Seattle culture that deeply intrigues me in a peculiar sort of way. They have their art and theatre and symphonies, their modern city with the monorail and space needle and Microsoft and Boeing, their coffee shops, their immaculate and tastefully modern high rise apartment, their sensible fashion sense, and, above all, their semi-British proper and correct speech patterns. Frasier and Seattle in the late 90s represent the absolute epitome of American high culture. It's so cosmopolitan, so clean and crisp but suave. A lot of great stuff was coming out of Seattle and it all represented the crème de la crème of mature sophistication in America. This was before George W, before Family Guy and Jersey Shore and Paris Hilton. Before Beiber and Ke$ha and Rebecca Black. Back when culture refined tastes were valued, a time of prosperity, before shit went down the tubes and we ended up where we are today...


So, Frasier, I salute you, a bastion of culture in a brain-dead world, a societal leader, and a reminder of better days...

Humble Beginnings

I decided to start a blog cause I'm a self-centred asshole who thinks every single thought that wiggles its way into my glorious head deserves to be published for the masses to read. I'm also a chronic procrastinator, so if I blog as a method of procrastination I figure I might possibly get something of some value out of it... at least it's better than lurking facebook waiting for that to somehow entertain me.

So the purpose of this blog is for me to muse, complain, rant, praise, review, comment, grumble, babble, wax eloquent, yell incoherently, create, and destroy. The content will be all the random shit I think about when I should be doing other things, namely homework and sleep. Right now it's 2:30am, I have class at 10 in the morning, and I have a group presentation at 1:00. Job well done so far.